Last week’s sermon was about the importance of building community relationships in a time when too many are on the front lines of battling isolation and loneliness.  The quick pace of life combined with a myriad of worries weighing us down have left many easy-going conversations with store clerks, receptionists, and baristas by the wayside.

One social practice that can help elevate both the giver and the receiver is paying compliments.  A simple compliment can make a world of difference to someone who can easily feel that they are unnoticed.

There are some who grew up with the idea that you shouldn’t pay a compliment.  Why?  Because it will give the person a “swell head” or a big ego.  I’ve never seen that happen.  In fact, I find that people are starved for compliments not least because of the negative self-image that a lot of people carry with them about themselves.  Granted, that trait can make it difficult for some people to receive a compliment (they will often downplay the compliment with something like “I didn’t do anything special” or “I’ve got you fooled, don’t I?”) but it is still worth paying the compliment because it goes in!  It can do more than you realize to help that person see themselves in a better light.

You may also be reluctant to pay someone a compliment because you are unsure of how they will react or you feel you don’t know them well enough or you’re just shy.  Try it anyway.  Start small.  Maybe you can complement something they are wearing.  Maybe you can complement how they handled a situation.  Maybe you can complement their patience or creativity.  In many ways, a complement is just a next-level “thank you” only it sticks better because it’s personalized.

I believe complimenting is an act of faithful discipleship.  Why?  Because it builds people up and helps them on the road to being all that God created them to be.  For too long our faith has taught that in light of God’s infinite power and grace, we are all unworthy.  Nonsense!  It is precisely because of God’s infinite power and grace that we are all worthy.  

As disciples of Christ, we can be those who remind people of their worth and value simply by paying a compliment.  And it comes with a bonus: You’ll feel uplifted too!

See you in church,  (And that shirt looks great on you!)

–Rev. Dominic